Showing posts with label jokes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label jokes. Show all posts

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Filthy Wednesday

Bone-swarr, aujourd-hui!

We hear at Pink Otter Party is enjoy the midweek hoodilay, know as "Filthy Wednesday"  
(or, for you Okaasan-types, "Fi-ru-see U-e-n-su-day").


Filthy Wednesday trace its original back to Drood, ancient robe-guys too bizzy making stone hedges, so no bovver to take baffs. In this respect, such venereal hoodilay is celibation of the relax and bum-like altitude which is how we want to emu-




late.


Everybuddy wanting us,,,go-go-go!!! 


All the time!!!

I say,,,NO-NO-NO!!!



We sick ov!!! 

We think Drood, like man in pub, has a "point" (har-har)!



"Ancient" Bean freerain from this hoodilay, in honor ov his greezy hare, which preventings him from indulge, like us other jolly good fallows.

But, he with us in sp - it, which prods us on
                    (ir)

to 
greater 
depths.  :-)

  
Even Pink Otter, that most delly cat and 
(***) glamoruss (***), of creature, suggest:
 
"eh,bradda,why not go for broke-- how bow'Dirty Thursday' heyhey!!!"


I, for too, say, INDEED!!!


"Be-gone, fowl dwimmerlake!" sayz the aptly-named Old Bean, all pointy-finga, boomly-voice and Merlin-like.


(O for the love of dog!!!) 

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Whaaaa?

Knockety, knock-knock, knock-knock!

(cautious peeking thru door crack) "Who dat?"

"Chester!"

"Whaaaa? I not buy nothin! Go way! Leaf me lone!" (slam!)


(trying again) Knockety, knock-knock, knock-knock!

(all light out, creepy up on door, one eye look thru pee(p)hole, no say nuthin...then...a evile cat walk into yard, big as please! Door flies open...or is that "Flies open door"???) "Hey, get out, stoopid cat! I get broom on you...no poop in my yard! Go home, get, get...I go wild woman on you...I turn water on, hose you! Boo! Boo!  

(assessing situations) "Hey! Hey, You! What you doin, all wild woman on dat cat? Let me bring back to you what call, REALTY. In Otter words, dis what is call 'joque' (pronounce 'ho-kay' in Spanish). Afta I say "Chester", you a-posed ta say, 'Chester who?', then I a-posed ta say: 'Chester Drawers!!!'"

Then, hillary ensue!!!

But now you go an roonin my joke, all for stoopid poopin cat...Well! 

(evile chin rubbing) I shall half the last lalf...just try say dis, while you watching evile neighbor cat poops in your yard--MUAHAHAHAHA!

The Sixth Sick Sheikh's Sixth Sheep's Sick.

Or, bitter yet:

Lesser Leather Never Weathered Wetter Weather Better. 


M U A H A H A H A H A A A A A A A A!







Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Words to Live...bye!

Zut Alors!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 


It has suddenly dawn on me, and the serveral members of Pink Otter's Party, that Wee (that is to say, Us),  cumulatively, gratuitously, and unanimously, has acquired a lifetime of wizz-doms and other carp to passing on for you.

Tonight, this night of nights, many words are ringing in our ear, words we feel obrigate to bringing to your doorstep, not like fiery poop, but like beautiful mystery babies, or the surprise delivery package, or other gift!!!!!!!!!



Lucky you!!! 


YOu, dear reader, will be abolslutely swollen with wisdom wiffin space of mere minutes, all doo to the kindly of Pink Otter's Party !!!


Attentions must be payed!   (so sit down, and clam up!)


Here Wee Go!!!  (and try not to making a mess!)


Pink Otter Wizz-dom:
"I cahnt give you anyting but love, baby...
That the only ting I plenty off, baby!"
(Ev''body now!)
"I cahnt give you anyting but love, baby...
That the only ting I plenty off, baby!"


Chicky Wot-zit Wizz-dom: 
"Franky, my deer, I dont' give a dime! So get outta here, with your..."(shaddap!) 

(voice from the cowed: "O, deer!")

Okaasan Wizz-dom:
"Why don' pee pull just leave me 'lone?!" 


Old Bean Wizzdom: 
"Let the strangeness commence!" (continue???)



Chiyo-ni (who???) Wizz-dom:
"Bore not others, as others bore unto you."


Tiberious Wizz-dom:
"Provide, provide!" 

And the final words of wizz-dom, from all of us:



"You're soaking in it!" (Oh, Madge!)








Friday, December 31, 2010

"Pink. James Pink."

BingBingBingBingBingBing!!!!!!


Hey...you hit-a jackpot..... Cock-a-doodle-doo!!!

You, Sir or Madman, has winning a prize!!!!!



You're prize is: the very privilege of knowing Mr. P'inks firsts and middles names!!!!!!!!


Aren't you excitment???


What? 

I see the disk of point mint wrapped up in you face like-a crumple up toilet papers that stick to shoo, and you dragging out in front of evrybody. 


Clean that mess up!


Ohhh,,,, waitaminute......did you think you whining one millyon dollar or sumthin? What kina joint you think dis is, Bud? Buddy? Buster?



Or shall I say........Mac????


Oil well. Look on the blight side: you has more useless crap to crowding up you'r brain!!!


NOw...attentions must be paid...or elfs!!


This very holiday seasoning, Old Bean and me surf-risingly finding out that Mr. Pink, lov-a-ble relax consultant and bear-child, has Firsts and Middles names, in addings to the Last name of Pink.


You dont' say?


Hey...Quitus interupptus!


Ahem...meanwhile, accompanying us on our troubles travels, Mr. Pink make known to us, being of sound mind and body, that he would liking to be, henceforth and yonder, re-furred to as:




"PINK. JAMES PINK."




yOU herd right! Your honor of his Engrish heritage, with liberty and justice for all!


Sudsquaintly, afta much more dillydalling, we also finds out the eloosive Middle Name, entitle:


"UTAEMON"  !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Named after the famed-moose acter, Ichikawa Utaemon, whom Okaasan adoored while growling up in Japan.    (Looky-loo!!:  Ichikawa Utaemon)




What-a relevation!!!   


Now for some fun...L'ets say, in the altogether, with big booming voice: 


"MR. JAMES UTAEMON PINK"

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!




Did you do it?????   Hmmm???


Do'nt lie to me, Argentina!!!  Eye is watchin' you!!!

Meantimes, have-a fabyoo-louse Knew Year, and try not to destroy your world!!!

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Carry Me, Grant!

{Herro}
{Herro}
{Herro}...
HERRO!!!

My, isn't it worm! 


We hair at Pink Otter Potty is wishing you dis-ease 



(free)

 
hoodilay seasons.  


I, being ill and thairfour men ass to society, have ingenuonuously cree-ated my own spittoon    (click here: Helpful info to learning spittoon!)

out of purasuchikku 

(or prastic, for those of you unfortunate wivvout Okaasans)  

bagusu (baggs

of the Vons or Albert's Son variety.

This makeshi(f)t spittoon is then place near the place whair bolidy fruid (namely, spat,) may moss occur, such as bed, florr, car, or lastly, couch, where one is forced to lie, cat and chocklate at hand, whatching Cary Grant movies. 

O, the humanity!

Now I say to you, much as Cary Grant say to Ev-a Me-a Alone-a Saint in North by West:

"How does a girl like you get to be a boy like me?"


Or, vice versa!!!

Hhmmmm???????


Actuarilly, nothing beat the Cary Grant movie to put the smile on you! 

As Leave Me Alone Saint say to Carry-Me Grant, "It's a nice face."



OOOOOOOoooooooohhhhhhhhhhhyyyyyyyeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!! 

 (click here) "A little trouty, but quite good!"



:-)    :-)    :-)     :-)     :-))))))))))))))))))))))))))

 

t-OUCH-é!


TO SIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



WITH LOVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



(mumblebumble garblebarble)...g'nite, ev'b'dy--BE GOOD, and remember the secret phrase that bind us all in dis floating whirl:



"the goat is squeezing through the sphincter"

!



Friday, December 10, 2010

Looney (spit)Toons

Hey!!!!!!!!!! Hows' goin'???

I glad to see Da Evil Mang did not turn you into cat ff-ff,fffff...ffsphtff-ff (coughcough) ffFFfFfFf
-ood! 

(sorry, please xcuse my sudden a tack of Turnips Syndrome). As a wize man wunce observe when confronting with "The Mange": "pure_fuzzy_hate"!

Dis same wize man also say: "I (like) cats, but I (want) food". 

How right you are, sir! How right you are!

And you?

Are you getting fat with sea son's eatings? Me, too!!! An dont' forget to overdrinking as well!!!

Alongs with multiple eatings and drinkings, another "joy" (coughcough) of the see-sun has been, and I shall spell it for you, F-L-E-M-.

Yes!

That fowl-weather friend, that long and winded road, that (coughcough-spitspit) nut that cannot be crack!

Hey, nutbags!

That remind me of a joke I just make up: wats' pink and coughs and spits?
.
.
.
a FLEM-ingo!!!!!

(chitty-chitty.........bangbang!)

P.S. and, goodnite!!!!!!!!!!!!

(coughcoughcoughcoughcoughcoughcough)...

Hey, nutbag, hand me my spittoon!